As Super Bowl Eve comes to a close, the Campbell's Chunky Soup Curse, a fluid so nasty that federal water safety standards limit it to one part per million picoliters (picolitres outside the US), has one last stake in the big game: Jonathan Vilma.
Cursetographers are divided over Vilma's likelihood of being attacked on the national stage. Many say his period of endorsement -- one very busy season when there were seven endorsers -- should limit his exposure to the Curse.
Others point to the example of Brian Urlacher, who time as an endorser was limited to a single lunch in 2004 when he told a friend not spoil the soup by putting crackers in it. Such a limit endorsement role did nothing to prevent the Curse from attacking repeatedly over much of the last decade.
The Campbell's Chunky Soup Curse, a curse so wretched it will be featured next season on Dirty Jobs, challenged Philadelphia Eagles coach Andy Reid to "spit Donovan McNabb out so I can kill him."
Curse watchers were astonished when halfway through the third quarter of the Eagles-Cowboys playoff game Reid unhinged his jaw and swallowed McNabb in a single go.
The Curse was in Dallas this weekend in the hope of performing a double-whammy against McNabb and Cowboys OLB Demarcus Ware.
The Campbell's Chunky Soup Curse -- a curse so wretched people don't say it about the New York Yankees -- has fallen on a late season slump.
Curse watcher are astonished to see former endorsers LaDainian Tomlinson, Ben Roethlisberger and DeMarcus Ware still walking. Worse, Donovan McNabb is playing some of the best football of his career.
NFL Network Cursiologist Marshall Faulk opined, "The Curse peaked early this year. It's time to have real doubts about the Curse going into the playoffs."
Larry Johnson, now a former Kansas City Chief, shocked the curse watching community. Most curse observer thought that Johnson's brief one year stint as an endorser of Campbell's Chunky Soup -- the most disgusting soup not made with PlayDough, ketchup and Pepsi --would limit his exposure to the evil curse.
They were wrong.
A side effect of Johnson's exposure to Campbell's Chunky Soup, a compound so lethal the federal government refuses to attack it, has been a rapid decline in mental acuity.
